Waking up to the sunrise after a good night’s sleep is one of the more satisfying things in life. This is especially true when the night in question was the first of the Trump administration, a night which, naturally, would be filled with uncertainty and unease.
It was entirely possible, I had been warned, that as soon as our new President was sworn in, all manner of terrible things were liable to happen. While I may not be a pessimist, I admit to having been slightly anxious about the chance of calamity. After all, this website had only launched yesterday morning! I would have been inconsolable if civilization as we know it had ended before I got around to posting a single paragraph.
Thankfully, the world was still more or less the same as it was yesterday, which meant I could write down my first thoughts for this blog in relative peace. Of course, I hadn’t noticed that the plastic bag the newspaper comes in was wet. When I set it down on the table, water got all over the placemat. But I didn’t let this faze me; surely it was just a slight hiccup in an otherwise perfect morning.
Upon opening the pantry, I discovered that the Honey Nut Cheerios container was empty, which meant enduring the long trek into the garage for another box. Then, there was only half a glass of orange juice remaining in the carton, so I was forced to ration it to ensure it lasted through the entirety of breakfast. The likelihood of these incidents being tied to the occupant of the White House seemed poor, but I vowed to keep watch for a continuing pattern.
After eating, I got in the shower. There is a clear correlation between being under a steady stream of hot water and thinking clearly, and I had a lot of thinking to do. Unfortunately, I didn’t realize that I had squeezed more shampoo than usual into my hand. When I began to wash my hair, a rather large drop fell into my left eye, jolting me from my thoughts.
At this point, I didn’t know what to do. Three minor inconveniences in one day I could write off as mere coincidence, but a fourth? Perhaps the new President was the cause of my miserable morning, casting horrible spells in my direction from his perch atop the government. Faced with this new revelation, I proceeded as any rational person would: forgo the rest of the day, and instead retire to the safety of my bed. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep, hopeful for what the dawn’s early light would bring.
VeeOhhExx 